In Loving Memory
The 30th June 2007 marks the 11th anniversary of the passing of my brother
On Sunday night I sat at home and just got this overwhelming feeling come over me. I always wondered what this empty feeling i feel inside was all about. Thought maybe i have it cause i am single but realised it is not that cause even when i was with someone i still felt the emptiness. Then it came to me, even though my brother has been dead for 11years it was his absence that made me feel empty inside. That was shocking for me to discover but definately made sense after sitting there and thinking about it.
The death of a loved one or even someone close to you is never really easy and i think what makes it hard for us is the way we deal with it. Some people deal with the loss of a loved one by death and some people deal with it within time and then you have some people who just blocks it out and others who deals with it right there and then as it happens. Either way it is never really easy. I had someone ask me "Why do you still find the loss of your brother so hard after 11yrs?" and i told that person that i live my life the way my brother did and there are still many things that reminds me of him and its not just a feeling that i would just like to forget.
The day he died is still as clear as night but now i am starting to smile when i think of it. I think my time for mourning my brother has come to its end and i think my time for celebrating his life has started. I think of the one most important thing at this point and that is, i may have lost my brother on earth but heaven has gained another angel!!!!!! Even though he no longer is here, his memory still lives on and he will always be loved and 10years from now i will look back and say my brother is up there looking down on me and is here with me in spirit.
I will always love you
